Too difficult?

Things are often too difficult, aren't they?

It's not so simple running a farm with over 100 animals. It's hard work from sun-up to sundown.

Feeding , which at this time of the year means dragging bales through the snow.

Breaking up ice on the water or replacing the floating heaters, so fresh, potable water is available.

Noticing when my "old llama girl" is shivering and needs a coat.

Seeing the eager faces when I come into the barn to feed hay and grain -- only to leave with a wad of spit in my hair.

But it's so worth it.

It makes me have a reason for being. It makes me get up in the morning and smile at the day. It makes me happy.

That's why the thought of having to sell our property and "downsize" is so frightening. Much of my identity is wrapped up with these animals, and their care.

My grandchildren love the farm. They like climbing the trees, walking the llamas and alpacas, jumping on hay bales, riding in the golf carts -- the whole package.

Ben comes home on the weekend and he, too, loves the farm. Specifically he'll say, "I LOVE this house."

Let's hope we're able to sell enough animals this year to sustain this adventure. Let's hope that people sign up for the "3 Sisters Workshops" series we're launching. Let's hope people buy yarn and handmade hats from me by the dozens. Let's hope people needing 401k rollovers call my husband at his office and get great service, a dedicated financial planner -- and we get the benefit of new business.

The economy is awful and it has hit us very, very hard.

I'm not yet ready to give up on this dream.